No Clever Title - I'm in a Creative Rut
I sit here overlooking the incredible Great Lake from the deck off my shack, with a G&T in my hand and dogs at my feet. It’s quiet, cool and misty, the kind of weather where I’m wearing shorts but can still have a cuddly hoodie on as well. The clouds slide across the sky but the lake is completely still, the calmest I’ve seen in since I moved to Tasmania almost six years ago.
I am surrounded by absolute beauty, and I am utterly, and completely in a creative rut.
I’m on day three of five trying to gain a little bit of creativity back; journalling, walking, going down to the lake, drinking a (too expensive but equally luxurious) bottle of gin. I’m trying (and failing) to create some sort of plan of what I want 2022 to look like in my business.
And I’m in a rut.
To be honest, the end of 2021 completely took it out of me - I’ve only just finished up the final pet portraits that I had booked in back in August. I had, of course, over booked myself and struggled to the finish line of Christmas and just didn’t quite make it. I have the most incredibly understanding collectors though, who were happy to receive their portraits in January. Thank God.
So in December I had promised myself that 2022 was going to look different; slower, balanced, more relaxed, with space to work on both my pet portraits and my originals in equal measure. I had all of these great ideas and plans and almost pulled out my diary to put all my plans and goals into action, but ‘no’ I though to myself, ‘let’s finish up 2021 properly first, and then we can come back to the exciting planning of the next year in January.’
Well, it’s now nearly February and I am absolutely flummoxed. I don’t know where that excitement went, hell I don’t even know where some of those ideas went! It reminds me of what Elizabeth Gilbert wrote in her book Big Magic, about how ideas float around in the universe and pick a human, and if that human doesn’t grab that idea with all of her strength and act upon it that idea will float off to pick another human instead. Badly paraphrased, but you get the idea - my big idea for my next series seems to have floated off to find another artist that can realise it properly.
And so, I seem to be in a creative rut.
All is not lost however; the beautiful thing about being an artist are commissions, and pet portraits are opening up in a couple of weeks. Back to the drawing board to bring some gorgeous puppers and kitties to life on paper. I have a feeling that just sitting down, pencil in hand will knock a cog loose in my muddled brain to start working properly again!
From what I’ve read on other Facebook groups and collectives, I’m not alone. There’s something about a new year, new goals and the impending imposter syndrome and complete lack of faith in our abilities as creatives that knocks us in a spin by the end of January, beginning of February. Perhaps it’s when we finally realise just how much work it will take to meet our goals, or maybe we’ve just spend WAY too much time on Instagram scrolling aimlessly through other artists and just wishing we had their success, their ability.
What was the quote?